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A Wintervention

A Wintervention

'Tis the season to get stuck in a wardrobe rut fa la la la la, la la la la....

Tell me it's not just me. The morning closet stare is becoming all too common these days and my sartorial choices are a little too bland for my taste. My priorities when getting dressed are making me very, very sad. I look at my closet and think, "Which sweater will keep me warmest while simultaneously fitting into the tight sleeves of my shearling Acne jacket?" I think, "Which shoes will be safest and most comfortable for the ombre slushy snow?" Ew. Safest? Most comfortable? Who am I?!

wardrobe rut

Today I wore Timberlands. I hope you can find it in your hearts to forgive me.

 

I have this love-hate relationship with the snow. I love to watch it fall (from the comfort of my over-heated apartment). I love the excuse it gives me to curl up on the couch, drink hot chocolate (homemade with almond milk and cacao powder) and binge watch season 1 of Orange is the New Black. I'm actually fascinated by snowflakes - I like to catch them on my gloves and stare at them really closely... which sounds strange and a little creepy but try it! It'll blow your mind! But what I hate is what the snow is doing to my edgifying skills. Poof! Out the window. I've become someone who gets dressed solely for comfort and warmth, and that my friends is what I like to call SCARY.

I've started to notice that during this premature, frigid and unwelcome winter (seriously, go back to Antarctica where you belong), I am only utilizing about 5% of the weapons in my arsenal aka goodies in my bag aka clothing in my closet. That is seriously wasteful! I know it's bad when my rad wide leg cropped trousers stare me down every morning, begging me to take them for a spin but all I can think about is the 20 degree air creeping up my ankles and creating a tidal wave of goosebumps up my legs! The horror!!!

And let's not forget the works of art hiding in my shoe collection, weeping from neglect. I can see the judgement, the utter disgust in my white suede Manolo Blahnik BB pumps' imaginary eyes as I shamefully reach for my beat up Timberlands. "It's snowing! Besides, I'm just going to Duane Reade!" I defensively protest. "Not to mention, you're SUEDE! It's a war zone out there for you. You'll be destroyed!" But I see the warning in my Manolos' hypothetical eyes. "That's where it all starts.... let the justifications begin. Before you know it you'll be wearing nothing but Uniqlo Heattech (best invention ever), your plaid lumberjack scarf, or shall I say blanket that for the record does not complement your pale skin and those unbearable Timberlands all winter." Which happens to be precisely what I am wearing today. And what I may or may not have worn for 3 consecutive days last time it snowed. Just shoot me now.

Ladies and gents, boys and girls, it's time for a WINTERVENTION. (Insert applause sound effect for that winner word I just winvented. Too much?)

I am challenging myself for the next 3 days to choose my look only from the 95% (not to be confused with "the 99%" hee hee, hoo hoo, get it?) of the neglected clothes in my closet, regardless of weather conditions (there will be blood snow). Stay tuned.

Who else is stuck in a winter wardrobe rut and wants to join the Wintervention Challenge? COME ON PEOPLE. JOIN HANDS. START A LOVE TRAIN, A LOVE TRAIN.  We can totally do this together. Totally. (I'm so scared you guys.)

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